Shine
Your eyes shine when you look at me. I am mezmerized by their brilliance. Held captive under your gave. I should be afraid of these feelings but I have no sense to run away. If I run it's only into your arms. If I flee, I retreat into your presence. Yes there is a shine. In your eyes and in your smile. And in your heart, I think, where I hope to stay. Forever
Dished out by Anonymous more or less at 3:09 AM
A bit pissed
Hmmm...I am pretty sure that when I say "call and let me know what's going on as soon as you know" means
as soon as you know. I thought I stressed that in our convo. I spent the whole day running around trying to get everything ready in case you where coming in today. My back was killing me and....Well no use in bitching about it now.
I'm only putting this here because you've asked me to document these fits. I will seek out the healing power of codeine and Ha pics...
Dished out by Anonymous more or less at 2:52 AM
At the ready
The apartment is clean.
My computer is free of any scandalous porn.
I've made room for you in my closets.
I have a list of things to do, if we need structure.
I can stay in bed all week, if we don't.
My life is ready for you.
I wonder when you'll get here?
Dished out by Anonymous more or less at 12:03 AM
I will see you soon. Maybe even tomorrow?!!!!
What will it be like?
What's going to happen?
Will you still feel the way you do?
Will you change your mind?
Will we feel awkward and funny? Like we don't know each other? Will it be perfectly natural and comfortable. Like we've been with each other all along?
Will i panick and act like a different person?
Will i feel shy?
Dished out by IB more or less at 8:25 PM
Please please please don't worry.....
"Setbacks" can be gifts.
I know it royally sucks and we had our hearts set on San Fran, but, hey, we've waited this long, what's one more week? It would have been fun, but also stressful and I'm glad you'll save all that money! New York is only a week a way! And i can almost taste the champagne.
It going to be wonderful. And i can't wait.
Dished out by IB more or less at 4:35 PM
OH GOD
I am quite the disaster. Hysterically happy and distressed. Is it really possible? I'll truly see you soon? How do you maintain the mellow, while I'm precariously close to utter implosion.
Dished out by IB more or less at 3:08 AM
Fits Are to Be Shared
Are those keys for me?!?!?!
i adore your honesty.... it gives me perpetual hope.... it convinces me unequivocably that we will in fact conquer all, and the pure force and power of our friendship & comraderie will be the envy of all...
so tell me more about it then
what was it about? -the upset-ness? why do you feel it was childish and controlling? i need more more more
Dished out by IB more or less at 8:03 PM
P.S.
Dished out by IB more or less at 7:53 PM
I'm ready
got the account set up.
the bed will be ordered next week.
my crap will be thrown out soon.
and I have these waiting:
Now all I have to do is wait for you!
Dished out by Anonymous more or less at 5:13 PM
Little boy
yup it's true: I go two days w/out calling you and I'm fine. you can't take my call (for much better reasons) and I get...upset-ish.
i know it's dumb. and childish. and vaugely controlling.
i know, i know, i know.
but in these tiny moments i am reminded of my marraige. the same secnerios where i was too lacsh, too mellow, and i payed the price. but you're not her.
not even a little bit close.
so i do worry, because i have everything could ask for, in potencial, but not in front of me. i know you care about me but i don't know if you love me.
so until then...i'll try to throw my fits in privete and let you enjoy your last days in your old life.
Dished out by Anonymous more or less at 1:53 AM
The glory that is...
your voice in it's pitch of A
your fun laugh, filled with excitement
your personal and open writing, allowing me inside your private picture show
your smile, when you use it
your inner fire that threatens to scorch any errant comments
your succulent body with it's round edges
your sexy mind, that it may teach me things old & new
and lastly...Your 'Ha. Bravo!
Dished out by Anonymous more or less at 12:31 AM
YEAH BUDDY!
WE ROCK!!
Dished out by IB more or less at 12:12 AM
Settled
we rock at problem solving!
a simple exchange of truhful feelings is usaly all it takes to squash most concerns. i do believe there is only one major one left. but we both know it will be cool beans.
Let the ass kicking continue
Dished out by Anonymous more or less at 10:55 PM
::sad face::
Definitely want to know. And its absolutely your business. I appreciate you telling me!
Can you tell me more about it please?
PS: How did your appointment go today?
Dished out by IB more or less at 6:42 PM
for some reason your last post (on your blog) made me feel...angry.
not sure why. pretty sure it's none of my business. i don't want to upset you. but i thought you should know.
Dished out by Anonymous more or less at 6:07 PM
Always more
I need to see into your places.
Big and small, beautiful and ugly.
To find the things which have been hiding I will roam your inner earth. Your night time murky pools and dusk covered treasure spots.
It is to be in love that I seek most from your pumping heart. To be greater than whole, to which I already am, I must come wise to your virtues.
So don't block my path fairy girl, I will not trample your garden.
Don't pull on my robes for they are the artifice of my magick's might.
You have given me something special; right. But I can not be bought with half of your wonder and a quarter of your glory.
I need it all.
I need more of it.
Always more...
Dished out by Anonymous more or less at 8:56 PM
steam
i am tired. this whole experience is taxing in ways i never thought of. reaching such fantastic highs and dreadful lows is killing me. i have a feeling it's been taking it's toll on you. for the first time in weeks i am once again spilt between abject bliss and calling the whole thing off.
but we can't stop now. only some queit time, together, in this our soon to be home, will calm these tremors. only the other's nervous smile and jittery laughs will sooth the churning sea of doubt within.
i don't want to disappoint you and i don't want to be wrong about this. i want to come together and make our way in this fucked up world; together. i want to harness Secret Power for all it's worth. i know it will be good, i'm just tired right now.
so don't be so hard on me if i don't shine so much for a little while. don't be so hard on yourself. we are worse then our fears. we control this affair. no one and nothing else. just us.
like its supposed to be...
Dished out by Anonymous more or less at 9:36 AM
Living in Tropper Time
Speaking of feeling as though we are with each other despite geographic separation; this morning i woke and slumbered a number of times. Instantly upon the first opening of my eyes there was you, and in my in-between state i squinted for the time: 1000am, grogilly adjusting it to match the proper corresponding timezone; 400p, then falling back into sleep. Upon the next drowsy emergence, i differed glancing clockwards as i recalled the recent awakening and estimated it was still within a short period of 400pm, neglecting to recall the timezone which i was
actually in.
Dished out by IB more or less at 8:42 PM
Puff of smoke
there is a fear that haunts me. a subtle voice that speak in crazy tongues about failure and jeopardy of the heart. i try to push it out of my head but like your presence, it is all around me. and as these days grow closer too
that day, the voice is getting louder, more forceful. but it will soon run out of breath because it is not match for your beguiling laugh and exuberant talk of things to come. so i think it's the one who's scared now. scared that the many years of harping and down playing are coming to an end. soon, it knows, it will utter it's last nasty remark and it will be gone forever.
like a puff of smoke...
Dished out by Anonymous more or less at 7:23 PM
